The blogging hiatus for the last couple of days has been due to some sickness making its way through the house. First Ty had it and missed two days of school (thank you fever) and then Jackson had it and missed a day of school and then Chase and I had it, and Lily sorta had it (while also cutting more teeth we think). Fun stuff!
We’ve done a whole lot of sleeping, watching Curious George and playing Wii games.
We’ve also been playing outside quite a bit. Actually, considering it is January we’ve been outside way more than the last couple of Januarys. We even headed outside for a bit yesterday afternoon – fresh air was what this doctor mom ordered. We’ve had more days over 50 than I can count and still virtually no snow! Now, I love mild winters and being able to shoo the kids outside, but I would also love a good snow storm and so would the boys. Plus, it kinda makes me nervous to see buds on my lilac bush and bulb flowers pushing up through the ground… in January!
I’m playing with perspective and trying new angles more often. I really love the way this one turned out, because your focus is entirely on the fun you can imagine is being had!
A couple of weeks ago, the boys and I were killing some time in between a birthday party and church, and we saw two hot air balloons drifting over the church! The boys love hot air balloons and begged to get out so they could wave. I wasn’t going to say no to that photo-opp!
Lily and I had a rare playdate without the boys, when we joined my moms group at a bounce house place! She got a big kick out of it, and I thoroughly enjoyed not having to be in continual “head counting” mode.
And we busted her having a bit too much fun with the tissue box. We still aren’t entirely sure how she got a hold of it!
So that’s what we’ve been up to lately. Lots of fun, lots of tissues and medicine and lots of togetherness on the couch, the front yard and the park!
I’ve been meaning to blog about this for a few weeks now, but kept forgetting. Darn you, mommy-brain! I’m going ahead and doing it now, just in case any of you have been slacking in the Christmas Clean-up department (like I was until about a week ago!) and still have the cards people sent you.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you our Bag of Blessings!
Inside that bag are all of the photo cards (or photos that were inside regular cards) we received at Christmas this year. The bag, while rather plain looking right now, will likely get an upgrade at some point this year. See, the bag sits on our dining room table and I’m thinking it’s only a matter of time before a cup of milk or water gets spilled and the liquid rushes toward the bag. (Nick is so clumsy with his cup! Ha!)
Ok, so why the cards, in the bag, on the table…
Each day, at one of the meals (usually dinner) the Kid of the Day closes his eyes, reaches into the bag, and pulls a card out at random. We then discuss who the people on the card are, and how we (or more often, how I) know them. Then the Kid of the Day does something really sweet, adorable and touching…
He prays for the people on the card.
Most of the prayers have gone like this “Dear God. Thank you for ____, ____, ____, ____ and ____. Please bless them and keep them healthy this year. Amen.”
Short and sweet! The boys are learning to think of other people, and get a kick out of drawing a card out and seeing who it is. The plan is to keep this up for the entire year, so if you sent us a photo card, know that you’ll be prayed for at least a few times this year!
On Saturday morning we celebrated Lily’s birthday with the only family in town (my sister Laura and her husband) and a few friends and their families. Lily seemed to enjoy just sitting and taking in all of the noise and activity, and the older kids (7 of them) all seemed to enjoy trying to smack the balloons hanging from the ceiling, eating cake and playing with Lily’s gifts.
Those balloons and streamers are still hanging in our living room today. The kids just love ‘em too much!
What’s going on, Daddy?
And you’re all singing, because???
I’m supposed to eat this, right?
Oh, yeah!
And this is where we can begin to play “Where’s Lily?”. See if you can find where the birthday girl is as her presents are being opened and played with…. hahaha
Aunt Laura tried to intervene, but it didn’t go so well.
She started her day with a brutal trip to the doctor’s office for her 1 year well check. The check-up wasn’t so bad, but she wasn’t a fan of the vaccinations and she really wasn’t a fan of the blood draw. I have never, ever heard her cry like that! It took three nurses to find a vein through all the chub on that arm and then they had a hard time getting the needle in. I felt terribly for her. Thankfully, once she calmed down she was back to her normal, smiley self and is now taking an awesome nap. Rest up, Lily! Tomorrow is party day!
12 Month Stats:
26 pounds (97th %)
30 inches (75th%)
Teeth: 6! (She just cut 4 on top in the last 10 days)
Talking: Not yet. She babbles a lot but hasn’t said any words we can claim as her “first word”. Jackson asked this morning if now that’s 1 she’ll talk.
Walking: Not yet. I thought for sure she’d be walking by now! She cruises furniture, toys and walls all the time. In the last 10 days or so she’s really started experimenting with standing and not holding onto anything. She did that a couple of months ago too, but then chickened out and stopped doing it.
Dear Lily,
It is hard to believe that one year ago the ground was covered in snow and I was holding you in my arms, two weeks sooner than we planned! You didn’t have a name yet, and wouldn’t for almost 2 days, but I enjoyed calling you “princess” and “beautiful” for the 36 hours you were nameless.
When your brothers were still toddlers, I knew in my heart that our family was not yet complete. Life was wonderful, but something seemed to be missing still. That “something” was definitely you! To get to watch your brothers learn what it’s like to have a younger sibling has been incredibly special. They simply adore you and you definitely seem to adore them!
Your father and I have loved doting on you for the last year, and I suspect we’ll have to really try hard to not spoil you in the future. You’re definitely our little princess and we just love the joy you bring to this house. You smile and giggle at the drop of a hat, and we all love it!
We can’t wait to watch you learn how to walk, how to talk and how to duck when a ball comes flying through the room, and I can’t wait until you’re old enough to go get a manicure with me! We love you, Miss Lily. Happy birthday, baby girl.
This time last year it was snowing like crazy and Nick and I were on our way to the hospital to check on my contractions. Hard to believe that was a year ago! Tomorrow (Friday, the 20th) Miss Lily turns 1. The last couple of nights when I’ve held her when she woke up crying (so random!) I’ve found myself getting all emotional just looking at her.
My baby is turning 1.
My baby won’t be a baby for much longer. Heck, she’s the size of a toddler already!
My baby is turning 1. Waaaah!
I find the best combatant for random emotional outbursts is to offer a random giveaway. Ok, not really but I had to find a way to tie this together.
The winner of this giveaway will receive the contents of this box!
Ok, so that’s not entirely accurate. You can’t have my baby girl! You can however, have what was inside this box before Lily took over…
Yep! 5 boxes of General Mills cereal! Man, I love cereal. If I was selfish, I would have hidden the boxes from my children so that I could eat them. Especially that Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Hello, sugary goodness!
Anyway, why the random boxes of cereal as a giveaway? Because Lily loves Cheerios.
Actually, it’s because the nice folks at MyBlogSpark and General Mills offered them to me! I like cereal and figure at least a handful of my readers do too. Right? If you’re healthy eating inclined, you can pop over to the General Mills Whole Grains site to read about the whole grain content in their cereals with the white check, and why whole grains are important!
Giveaway is now closed! Congrats to comment #11 – Jenna! Jenna, you have 48 hours to claim your prize or an alternate winner will be chosen.
How to Win:
Leave a comment with your very favorite birthday memory – from your birthday or a friend or family member’s birthday!
Winner will be randomly selected and announced on Tuesday the 24th. Winner will have 24 hours to claim their prize or an alternate winner will be selected. Giveaway is open only to those residing in the US.
Disclosure: The prize pack, information, and giveaway have been provided by General Mills through MyBlogSpark.
Let me lay something out here for you – women, by nature I think, struggle with insecurities. Do these people even like me? Why don’t I have any friends? Am I trendy enough or am I an embarrassment? Where have I gone wrong? I wish I looked like her. Is he still attracted to me?
Admit it. At some point in your life, you’ve struggled with this. When I was in junior high and high school I prided myself in totally not caring what other people thought of me. I didn’t let “the popular crowd” get to me. I didn’t care if I wasn’t wearing the latest clothes or best brands. I didn’t care that I was driving my grandmother’s old car. I didn’t care if people thought I was a snob because I wouldn’t party. I didn’t care if people looked down on my faith. I just didn’t care, and I was mighty proud of that.
When I was in college I still mostly subscribed to this take on life. I think as I started to realize I had gained some weight (thank you Freshman 15+) I started to waver in my “I don’t care what others think” attitude. The self-esteem issues were mild though, after all I was dating a boy I found to be quite hot and awesome (Hi, Nick!) and that definitely boosted me self-esteem.
You know when I really started struggling with insecurity?
During my pregnancy, just before I had the boys.
Bet you didn’t see that coming, huh? It’s true though. See, most of my friends here were either still single or were married but without kids yet. I can remember finding out that friends were going out and doing fun things together but not even bothering to invite me anymore, because they assumed (incorrectly!) that I would be too tired or would rather spend the time with Nick. And so began the feelings of self-doubt.
These insecurities have only gotten worse in the last 4.5 years. I never saw that coming, which I think might be why I’m struggling so hard with it. Little things seem to chip away at my secureness in myself…
Asking if anyone wants to meet at the zoo or a park and getting {crickets}.
Hearing friends and acquaintances got together for a playdate or a mom’s night out, but I was never invited.
Seeing other moms chatting in the halls at school/church about getting together soon, and being pretty jealous that I don’t have that.
Not ever really finding that “go-to” friend who I know will say “yes” when I ask to get together (either with or without friends), and not always have an excuse for why she can’t.
And the internet, while awesome for connecting people, has also been big in killing my self-esteem. Even things as silly as not getting blog comments. Are they reading and then laughing at me? Or trying to chat with people and repeatedly being ignored.
All of it is very silly, really. I’m glad I realize it’s silly and am trying to not give in to these feelings of insecurity. My security is not wrapped up in how I perceive other people perceive me. My security is wrapped up in my faith, my husband and my children – all things I’m proud of. When I die, I don’t want people to remember me as someone who was trendy, a decent photographer, a blogger or as someone who threw awesome playdates and parties. I want to be remembered as an awesome wife, mother and friend. Someone who was sympathetic, someone who wanted to change things for the better, someone who handled problems with grace.
So when people don’t comment on my blog I think, it’s ok, I’m not blogging for them anyway – I’m blogging for myself and my kids.
When I see other moms chatting with friends or hear other people getting together I think, I’m glad they have someone, don’t be jealous of them, Helen!
When I get turned down for a meet-up (whether directly or indirectly) I think, it’s ok – I’ll take the chance to bond with my kids more and just do it ourselves.
I’m not going to lie to you – I’m lonely and feeling lonely (which autocorrect tried to change to “looney” – how appropriate!) seems to exaggerate the insecurity. The loneliness is especially apparent when Nick is working a lot or is out of town (like he was for 5 days last week). I often wonder if I wouldn’t be as lonely (and therefore insecure) if we lived closer to the church (where the boys’ preschool is and most of our acquaintances live), or if we’d be invited to more playdates if my herd of children wasn’t a playdate in itself.
{shrug} This is the life I have. While I don’t love my house or neighborhood, at least we’re living below our means. While I wish I didn’t have to do continual head counting when out with the kids, I love the craziness of 4 kids age 4 and under and wouldn’t change it for the world.
Bottom line: I’m not giving in to the self-esteem issues I feel creeping up. Life with young kids is hard, lonely and exhausting. In 10 years I won’t remember these feelings quite so much, but I will remember that my kids said and did some of the funniest stuff at this age.
Fight the insecurity with me and embrace what you have. Before we know it, life will be changing again. Life has a tendency to do that….
1/22/12: Reading through the comments left here, comments left on Facebook and e-mails sent directly to me has been amazing! Do you all see how many of us are struggling with the very same feelings? Clearly we are not alone, now we all have to work on being bold and putting ourselves out there more often. Thank you all, for sharing honestly with me and the rest of the readers! I was trying to respond to each comment individually, but it got a little out of hand fairly quickly. Know that I’ve read each and every one, and many of them have brought me to tears.
For about 18 months now we’ve been using star charts with the boys, with much success. We’ve seen behaviors improved, some even to the point of not needing to be on the chart anymore, and we’ve seen the addition of simple chores the boys can do. This fall we tried adding a “Ready for School on Time” category to the charts, in hopes that it would lessen the morning stress. Sadly, it’s not been working as well as we had hoped.
Here’s the problem with the boys – it’s not that they don’t know where stuff is, or how to get dressed, or how to wash their faces… it’s that they have the attention span of a dog who suddenly spots a squirrel. Unless of course they’re playing Wii or watching Curious George. Then you can talk to them all day long and they won’t even “hear” you. (Notice I put quotes around “hear”? Yeah, selective hearing is in full swing here, for sure.)
Ok, so now that we’ve established that we have focus issues in this house, I decided that another chart was in order. A bigger chart. Something that the boys will think is fun and keep them on track!
Items needed:
Foam board – $4 at Michaels
Velcro dots – $3 at Michaels
4×6 prints of each child – .32 at Walgreens
Markers and, if you’re cool like me and don’t have a ruler in the house, hot wheels tracks are great for making straight lines in a pinch.
Chart Rules:
The boys do not get to move their face to the next square (which is held onto the chart using the velcro dots mentioned in the items needed list) until they have completed the task they are moving their face to. Here’s what we have on the chart:
#1 – I ate breakfast!
#2 – I am dressed! (This includes having socks and shoes on, because they were doing great with getting clothes on, but not so hot with getting socks and shoes on when it came time to leave)
#3 – My face is clean!
#4 – I have my coat and backpack! (This can mean either wearing them or they are on the couch, ready to grab.)
#6 – Bonus: I made my bed! (This one is a star they can earn if they are ready for school and also have time to make their bed before it’s time to leave.)
So how well does it work? It seems to have improved things a bit. We used it last week and again today. So far we haven’t had all three hit the bonus star at the same time, but at least there’s been less stress, less yelling, fewer time outs and they’ve been on time for school more often. We actually don’t need to be loading up the van until about 8:35, so by setting the limit for 10 minutes earlier it gives us a chance to “help” those that aren’t ready yet (and by us helping, they do not get a star for being ready on time).
Bottom line: the boys get a kick out of moving their faces, and Nick and I aren’t as stressed in the morning. A simple “you have 10 minutes left” or “you have 5 minutes left” is enough to make them run to their chart to see what else needs to be done. We’ll keep it for now, and when it stops being effective we’ll try something else!
One year ago today, Nick and I had a big blow out. I was a hormonal, emotional wreck (thank you pregnancy) and he was likely a bit tired of my hormonalness. The cause of the blow out? The unfinished state of the baby room. Actually, the room hadn’t even been started. No paint. No crib assembled. No changing table/dresser combo mounted to the wall. Nada. I had just watched Nick play with the boys for an entire afternoon and not do anything about that baby room, and I was annoyed!
Part of the “conversation” went like this….
Nick: What’s the rush? You’re not having her for 2 and a half weeks!
Me: She could come at any time, Nick! She doesn’t have to come on my scheduled c-section date. She could come tomorrow!
Nick: Well then worst case scenario, I’ll paint and get her room ready while you’re in the hospital.
Me: While watching the boys? I’d love to see that. (Said with copious amounts of sarcasm, of course.)
Two days later we spent a considerable amount of time on very snowy roads, driving back and forth to the hospital and then finally being admitted. Three days after the “discussion”, Lily was born and Nick then spent some very late nights putting together her room. I’m holding onto that “I told you so” for a rainy day. Ha!
Hard to believe birthday week is here for Miss Lily! On Friday afternoon I took Lily’s 1 year pictures and ended the session with a cake smash!
Jackson had turned on Curious George, which Lily was interested in. I had to tell him to stop distracting his sister
Looking at Jackson, who was now dancing around and acting silly for her.
Look at my cutie!
Look at those chunky feet! Most of the adorable shoes that were handed down to her have never fit, because her feet are so thick.
Let’s get to the cake part!
She wasted no time getting her hands dirty, but then she appeared to not like how it felt and tried to wipe it all off on her shirt. Ha! After she tasted the frosting though, she was all over that cake.
The boys were begging me to let them play with the cake too, so I finally relented and let them in on the fun..
After I posted this picture on my personal Facebook last night, a couple of friends remarked that it looked like Lily was explaining how to do things and it cracked me up! I have to share the caption one of my FB friends (and blog reader!) came up with last night for this one:
“Well guys, you see, there was this cake just sitting there, and so I just couldn’t resist grabbing a few handfuls…”
Obviously this was a big, fun mess! The tub was gross after all four of them had been bathed, and at least they kept the majority of the cake and frosting to the white backdrop (which did come clean, by the way). This was such a fun way to kick off the week leading up to Lily’s birthday! The boys already can’t wait to give her more cake at the end of this week, for her party.
Chase: Yes, everyone needs to pay a dollar to come to my wedding.
Ty: Mommy, did you take this picture?
Me: Yes, I did.
Ty: It’s a beautiful picture!
Jackson: Daddy, when I grow up I want to be like you…. and have an iPad 1.
Tyler: Mommy, you’re so pretty I would pick you like a flower!
Me: The answer is “no”.
Jackson: No, the answer is yes, Jesus loves me, so I should do the things God wants me to do. <long pause> And God says Jackson should get the coloring book back.
Lily: DADADADADADADADA (long, loud squeal)
Jackson: Mum, I’m packing to go on a holiday! Didn’t I tell you?
Then he came back into the room with a bag of candy and underwear. Ha! All the essentials.
To people who have yet to produce any off-spring, or their off-spring are still very young -
This post is to serve as a warning to you. A warning that few things are “safe” in your house when children are about.
Exhibit A:
Dishes and anything else that’s glass. Obviously this is a no-brainer. You probably guessed that anything remotely breakable and children do not mix. On Monday Jackson broke first this plate at lunch and then a bowl at dinner. See, whoever is Kid of the Day gets to use glass dishes and cups for the day. 9 times out of 10 everything survives the day, but Jackson was having an exceptionally butter-fingery day on Monday. *sigh* I love these dishes too. They were the set I registered for when Nick and I got married, and we’ve now had all 8 salad size plates, 5 bowls and 5 plates break.
For those of you that are shaking your heads now and saying “Silly mom for giving her children breakable plates – of course they’ll break! My dishes will stay whole because I won’t give them to my children.”, let me warn you… Flying balls and other objects also will cause breakage! I’ve lost many things to debris flying through the air and knocking something off the drying rack.
Exhibit B:
Not only do you re-organized and cut down on the amount of furniture you have (after all, coffee tables are prime launching pads for wild children and we need room for all of their “stuff”), but the items you leave out probably won’t survive your child’s early years. Better come to grips with that now, people.
Do you see how sad our couch is? The way the fabric has ripped back, it’s like we have a new Pit of Despair. Stuff just randomly falls down there. Lost the remote? Check inside the couch. Lost a Wii controller? Check inside the couch. Lost a cup? Check inside the couch.
Yeah, those springs aren’t supposed to be like that. I don’t even know how they got like that! Don’t even think about sitting on the middle cushion of our couch or you’ll likely fall into the giant hole. Now where did Lily go?
Exhibit C:
It is sad, but true… even the walls of your home aren’t safe. This huge “dent” was courtesy of some rather wild rough-housing. The details are fuzzy, but I can’t remember if that one was caused by a chair or a head. I know we have dents in the house from both.
Exhibit D:
I’ll spare you a picture of our gross carpet and leave it at this – small children, potty training, puking, spilled green apple slushes and carpets do not mix. It’s like a petri dish, I tell ya!
We won’t even get into the toys and books that are supposed to be durable enough to survive childhood, yet rarely do. That’s a whole other animal! For now, batten down the hatches of your house, hold on and make do. And remember, if you come to our house, don’t sit in the middle of the couch!
